The shock of the new, the unwillingness to change. Learning to be a
child again: to use the first words, to mispronounce, to apologize, to get lost
and not find the way, to ask for help though I know you won’t understand, to
not know how to read, to apologize again, to be afraid, to smile all the time. Don’t
run away. Learning the basic ways, deciphering symbols, sitting properly,
bowing, understanding the importance of a thank you, of a laugh. If I can’t
laugh with me, then no one will. To stare at the Inland Sea and think it is
home.
I buy groceries and make my first meal. The pride of one’s own creation.
Maybe this will work. Life is all one big maybe. I cannot miss you, you are too
far away. It is too late for the no, the oh well, the past and the tomorrow.
Sending you good wishes!
ReplyDeleteI remember the shock of not being able to read - it was strange, not being able to even sound out words or recognize the names of street signs. And how exhausted I was each day when all i did was follow people around. But I also remember the bike rides through rice paddy fields and each day being a new adventure.
Good luck and embrace it all!
-Kat
Chiba 2001-2002